51. My terrible cake decorating - Famous on Facebook. Blogged about here. My shame is mixed inextricably with my own self-deprecating pisstaking disgust at myself.
Eg:
52. Being called a Bitch - But only by a select number of people. My head teacher, for example. In a way that only he can get away with. You know you're boss respects you and likes you when he can call you a bitch and nobody gets hurt.
53. Crouching 80s Hidden Acronym - A random name for a ragtag collection of incredibly talented musos. This band is fronted by my brother, a nauseatingly brilliant human who has the Midas touch, but in a good way. With incredibly high energy and volume, they carve up each tiny stage they play on, tearing the venue and the crowd apart with their guitar riffs, erratic bass lines, screaming sax, tiny hunchy keyboard and harmonised vocals. Most of the stuff they do is original, but I love the fact that the bulk of their covers were originally released before they were born. Crowd favourite is Bowie's 'Let's Dance', and it is oh so amusing to see and hear a bunch of screamy teenyboppers go nuts over a song that is almost as old as I am! You can check them out on the unearthed site and at live.fm too.
54. Use of the word SOLEMNISE - Which of course sounds like 'Sodomise'. An amusing addition to any wedding ceremony, of course.
55. This photo:
Taken at sunrise, at the top of Arthur's Seat, overlooking the bay in Edinburgh. Sleep deprived and fueled almost entirely with vodka, this night/morning goes down as one of the best moments of the tour. Plus the fact that Simon (pictured) is only moments away from being punched in the makes it infinitely more amusing!
56. Winning at Trivia - Back in The Big Smoke, weekly pub trivia was just that... weekly. The Paddington Darts and (insert topical/amusing statement here) team were pretty gun. My competitive spirit got a weekly outlet. And I usually got to be scribe, but that was mostly because my voice is too loud, so even when I whispered answers, it would come out as a bellow. Now, triv is only something I get to dabble in when I get down to The Big Smoke for a holiday.
57. The big speech from The Witches - Back in my thespian days, I got to play The Grand High Witch in a production of Roald Dahl's The Witches. And I still know most of her epic speech by heart. Which impressed/frightened my year 7 class last year!
58. Pretty much everything Tim Burton does - Maybe it appeals to the emo in me. Wait, it probably pre-dates emo, so I am going to have to say it appeals to the goth in me. Like the aforementioned stripey socks. I love TB's aesthetic, with its twisty curled branches and slightly skewed framing. Of course, the inclusion of Johnny Depp, doesn't hurt either...
59. Q'est que cest that bird? - freaky suspended scare crows do wonders for the ambiance of a wedding, right?
60. Wearing brooches - especially when they are particularly random. My favourite is a little Lego pirate I bought at the Glebe markets. The Boys at The Factory cannot cope with such randomness.
"Miss, why are you wearing a Lego man?"
Gotta keep them guessing!
61. Ellen Page - She is just so goddam cute. Plus she is in Juno. And Whip It.
62. Knitting - I haven't done much this winter. And it really is a winter sport. West Bubblefuck in Summer is NOT friends with knitting. But there is a cupboard full of un-knitted yarn that I really should get my needles into. Best way to turn my brain off, kind of like constructive meditation.
63. Dirty sign language - Did you know that the signs for Vagina and Samosa are very similar. Sign language is ingenious in the way it turns words into actions. Watching Adam Hills' DVDs is great for my love of this, as he often has a signing interpreter... and he exploits them outrageously.
64. The fight scene in High Fidelity - I have been trying to find a still of the scene, right where Tim Robbins gets smashed in the teeth with the telephone. But it won't be found. A simple piece of slapstick that really shouldn't appeal to me, but it gets me everytime.
65. The Banjo Diva - I won't post the video of her playing. For fear of humiliation, though that would not be the purpose of posting it. My darling aunt learned to play 'Happy Birthday' for her mother's 80th birthday. The fact that my nauseatingly talented brother outplayed her was not very gracious of him, but it made for some hilarious times. And thus she became The Banjo Diva. I'm hoping she'll learn how to play 'Here Comes The Bride' before Scott & Rose's wedding!
66. Pyjamas - I have actually banned myself from buying any more. I am a big fan of flannies, and I love the fact that getting into PJs is almost like putting a full stop on the day. There will be no more trawling the halls of The Boy Factory if the jarmies are on!
67. Being a ranga - even though Gem says I am not allowed to call myself that. Originally I died it as a way of taking control of my life while living at home with my parents as I fast approached the ripe old age of 30. But I have been back again and again to the rouge, the rust, the roux, the ranga.... But only a ginger can call another ginger ginger.
68. The fact that DVDs are tax deductable - because there really does need to be some perks to being a teacher.
69. Any time this number us written anywhere - because really I am a puerile, juvenile, immature monkey who giggles at just about anything. My school friend Adam used to call it a "Danne-ism". Sparky today called me a "Smut". Smut as a proper noun? I like it!
70. Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip
Why aren't I in charge of the world? Or at least in charge of world wide television programming...?
Aaron Sorkin is a genius scriptwriter. Tommy Schlamme can direct for TV. In this, the golden era of the TV series, they created a golden crusted gem of a series. That only lasted for 1 season.
Set in the hectic insanity of the creation of a weekly live comedy sketch show a-la Saturday Night Live. But the show is more about the drama behind the scenes that the comedy in front of the camera. Matthew Perry doesn't stretch too far from Friends's Chandler. Bradley Whitford isn't sketched too far from The West Wing's Josh Lyman. But there is merit in almost recreating these well loved characters in a new context.
While the fact that this show was bitterly brief makes me want to wobble my bottom lip. But the fact that there are 22 beautifully crafted episodes to go back to is surely a reason to smile.
71. Frankie magazine -
[voice over in the style of a blockbuster film]
In a world where retouching and eating disorder are all too powerful.
image via
In an industry where diets and weight loss plans are used to get titles off the shelves.
In a nation where celebrity is king, and obsession with fame is choking us all
Comes a magazine that is so refreshing, so charming, so self-referential and based on the [shock horror] the ARTICLES (and not in Playboy kind of way).
Craft, life, cute brooches and tshirts. Art, music and other miscellany. A good read every 2 months!
73. Licking the bowl clean - Almost the best thing about baking is licking the spoon and bowl. Of course, having tasty tasty brownies is fantastic, but the juvenile joy of getting that gooey mixture everywhere is so sweet!
78. When someone I teach decides they want to be a teacher - I am not saying it is ME that is the reason. I just like it when someone else recognises what an amazing opportunity teaching is. And as much as it is hard work, and as much as putting up with teenagers being total douchebags, and with mammoth amounts of paperwork, and with total bullshit hoops to jump through, it is a really rewarding and enjoyable career.
79. My father's beard - The status quo for me is a Bearded Father. When all three of us were babies, when he was beardless, we would treat him like a stranger. His beard matches his personality, his body and his face. It is a pretty identifiable feature that easily says "Hey, I'm Chopper"
I work with Dad at The Boy Factory. Every 12 months or so, he ditches the facial follicles. Gives his baby-face a breather.
And I love how seriously everybody else takes this. His beard is so much a part of the culture of the school, that everybody feels like they have a claim of ownership. They all ask me "What do you think about your dad's beard?" I just think it is hysterical that everyone thinks they get a say!
78. X-Men - I used to love the cartoon. I LOVE the films, especially the first 2. I have almost finished reading the epic and wrist breaking X-Men 1, the compiled original comic books - described by my head teacher as the "nerdiest thing you have ever done". I can't WAIT for the next movies - there are FOUR in pre-production! Once again, my incredible capacity to geek shines through!
79. This picture
via here
Because I hate Twilight so much. And I don't much like hairless cats either. Unless it is Mr Bigglesworth...
80. This girl:
The Darby Monster is a total joy. Even when she is cranky pants. She almost has my birthday, and already I can see we like all the same stuff. Must be that early April thing. Three Cheese Omelette at the Toothie. Bacon. Birds on tshirts. Coffee (well, she digs babycinos more). MaryJane shoes. Twirling around for no apparent reason (I don't make time for that anymore... Note to self: make some twirling time).
This blonde bombshell is kinda the first of the next gen. The B Team (B by name, not order of awesomeness) were the first of my inner circle to build a baby, and what a babe she is!!
81. Eggs on the weekend - hungover or not, it just seems not like the weekend, unless there is eggs in the morning. Apparently the Heart Foundation just increased the number of recommended eggs for human consumption from 2 per week to 6. This makes me happy.
82. Yoga - I didn't want to like Yoga. My mum likes Yoga. But despite my desire to not like it, I really do. Except I don't much like the sitting still and breathing for an hour yoga. I like the moving around kinda stuff. Perhaps it is my supreme impatience, or my inability to sit still, or the fact that the whole navel gazing introspective thing makes me a little uncomfortable (even that admission feels a little bit too much like naval gazing to me...) But a few good warrior poses and downward dogs, with just a tiny bit of falling asleep at the end makes me get that still, contented smile.
83. Pancakes - Not the fluffy batter gently fried into cakey circles. But the alcoholic beverage kind. A lick of sugar, a shot of Frangelico, and a suck of a slice of lemon. Tastes exactly like a pancake with lemon and sugar on top. It creates a god-awful mess on benchtops of houseparties. And because Frangelico isn't a kick you in the back of the head percentage of alcohol like say, tequila, it seems to mix OK with beer, or wine, or whatever beverage of choice is that evening, without the excruciating headache the morning after. Well... mostly.
84. James McEvoy
85. Shots of London in films - especially stuff around the South Bank. The Eye. Waterloo Bridge. Hungerford Foot Bridge. The Tate. Love Actually was actually shot when I was living there in Waterloo, just down from the OXO Tower. We used to sit on the bench that Liam Neeson sat on. Some of the cast came in for post-work drinks. Including the very scrummy Andrew Lincoln ("Egg is in our pub!! Egg!!!!") (Hear that name? Just dropped it...). Shots in Edinburgh and Sydney make me grin too, but what with London being one of the most exciting cities in the world... it tends to turn up in quite a few more films than my other beloved cities.
86. That Girls - There once was a road trip, in the midst of the 21st season - that time when almost every weekend for the duration of 2 years in which the prime social real estate of Friday and Saturday nights were occupied by a 21st birthday. Or several. The road trip ones were for the truly committed. This particular one was up the coast at Woopi.
And it was on said road trip that the That Girls were formed. We were all That Girls in the car. The kind of girls that Aren't Well Liked. And it the unity makes us stronger!
87. Spies - Really great spy shows and spy films are spectacular. Last night I reminded my mother of James Bond and his Christmas Jones jokes. Gold. Sidney Bristow and her brilliance in a wig is unsurpassed (though I think Channel 7 is just about to attempt to launch something to compete... doesn't quite look as good though). Chuck kicks arse. Bourne rocks. All manner of acronyms - the CIA, MI5, KGB... ASIO doesn't quite have the same ring to it. I wonder if there is much of a call for English teachers to join ASIO... Probably not, huh?
88. Waking up WITHOUT a headache - especially when you have been sick for a while. Of course, being in the Germ Factory - oops, I mean The Boy Factory - I am living in a bit of a petri dish. And what with my completely decimated immune system (thanks Baxter College), if there is some kind of lurgy going around, chances are my sinuses and my tonsils will take that ball and run with it. There's a mixed metaphor, from petri dish to ball running in 2 lines!!
89. Waking up WITHOUT an alarm clock - The moment of joy that there was nothing that woke me up except a fullness of sleep. Ah, bliss.
90. Dystopian Young Adult Fiction - especially The Hunger Games and Chaos Walking. Just bought Hunger Games 3 this arvo! Am trying SO hard not to read it right now, because then it will be over!! I have harped on about this one already, over here.
91. This website: Kermit Bale
92. Afros with specs - and the fact that every time I see a guy with a fro and glasses, I think of Moss. Seriously, it happened in downtown West Bubblefuck last week!
93. All of Monty Python - even though now they are all a bunch of sexist, too rich to be funny, old men. But in their day... Well, they were a bunch of puerile, rediculous, sexist young men. But funny as hell.
94. The book of metal pages that holds all the wisdom of the sea - On the end of the promenade at Bondi Beach is a tombstone. An epitaph. An empty plinth to remind us of the Book of Metal Pages That Holds All The Wisdom Of The Sea. It is no longer there. But its wisdom is not forgotten.
"Some eat leftovers"
95. The Chaser - Undergraduate, private school boy humour it might be. But I miss them railing against everything in their War. I was delighted to see them back in The Great Indecision of 2010 in Yes We Canberra. Being media whores is not endearing to them really. They work much better together as a team.
96. This video:
The only thing this is missing is Joany and her awesome curves!
97. Scrabble - All new addiction on my BFF, oops I mean my iPhone. I say all new, but this has been going on for at least 7 weeks. And is isn't Scrabble (c), like proper brand name Scrabble. It's actually called Words with Friends. It has become somewhat of an addiction - I can play it with peeps all over the world!
Scrabble is always the opportunity for less-than-clean word usage. A dinner party with The A-Team in Edinburgh resulted in this:
98. The ocean - Being in it. Watching it. Listening to it. There is something about the sea that reduces problems to insignificance. How can something be big in comparison to the ocean?
99. Free stuff - like getting given a free chocolate mousse when all you really feel like doing is bursting in to tears. Sure fire cheer-upper-er
100. This list - Having 100 things that make me smile makes me a pretty lucky human. There are more than this list can name. But these are the ones that come to my without trying very hard.
I am a lucky girl. I'm pretty fun. I have great friends, and they show me everyday that I am loved. No matter what happens, I am lucky to be this happy.
Lovin #80...talk about how to give the b-team warm and fuzzies Divine-D...we will speed up Miss D's literacy skills so she gets to read this ASAP!!
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